Josh (Cake) Popped the Big Question: Tasty Tales from a Bridal Assistant

Cake Pop Combos.

When I occasionally fantasize about my way-far-off-in-the-future-someday-money-is-no-object wedding, I envision a perfectly clear blue sky, singing and ringing church bells, women wearing Kate Middleton-esque hats, and never-ending platters of bite-sized crab cakes being served by my faithful and loyal younger brothers (bless their hearts).  Okay, okay, snapping back to reality–that plan seems rather unlikely (especially the part about my brothers serving me crab cakes…), but I do hope that my hypothetical wedding won’t turn into one of those disasters begging to be turned into a major Hollywood production.  For example, I pity young and naïve Sophie in Mamma Mia for not knowing which of her three potential fathers should walk her down the aisle, then making the crucial game-time decision that she doesn’t want to get married, and then observing her mother commandeer her wedding for her own delayed, late-in-the-game, marital happily-ever-after.  Mamma Donna might want to put some money aside for Sophie’s therapy fund after that one…And that poor bride in Taylor Swift’s song “Speak Now?” Everyone always “ooohs” and “ahhhs” at T-Swizzle’s valor for speaking up and running off with the groom with whom she has a secret, passionate (yet PG-rated for her kindergarten fans) love affair, but whoever thinks about that poor girl in the wedding dress? Her day is obviously ruined considering some random skinny blonde chick with crazy hair in the pews just permanently ren-dez-vous-ed with her ex-husband-to-be.

Cake Crumbling Action Shots

But maybe before I plan and get paranoid about my entire wedding, I should, like, go to college first.  Meeting and falling in love with an eligible bachelor would probably be helpful as well.  Oh details, details…

Pre-dipped and sticked pops.

My cousin, Jenny, had every wedding detail under control a few weeks ago when she walked down the aisle in sunny Coronado, California.  The programs were printed, the name cards were placed, and her fashionable outfits were set and ready to go. She couldn’t have asked for a more beautiful day.  The sun was shining (yet it wasn’t blistering hot), the ocean waves consistently crashed gently on the beach, the breeze softly danced through the dinner tent to refresh the attendees as the sun crept behind the night clouds, and she was finally settling down for her happily-ever-after with Josh, her high-school sweetheart.  And, hey, she even had waiters prancing around with platters of bite-sized crab cakes.  The girl had it MADE.  Not to mention she treated the kids of all ages (including both my brothers and great-grandfather) to a free All You Can Eat Candy Bar.  Coming straight from the East Coast, the grass seemed three shades greener than it did back home.

Note the "Ugly-Duckling-Fail-Pop" on the top right...Awkward...Chocolate on chocolate. Mmmm.

There are numerous things that I will forever remember about Jenny and Josh’s wedding weekend in California.  Having served in the wedding as the ‘Bridal Assistant’ (I even have a labeled sweatshirt to prove it), I took responsibility in passing out programs, and it was my duty (read: pleasure) to accompany Jenny to have both our nails and hair done.  I will always remember meeting wonderful new family members, letting the stunning dress out the night before the wedding, watching my current family cry as the gorgeous bride walked down the aisle with her emotional father, and even dropping a glass in the middle of the dance floor at the reception (embarrassing…).  Though another thing that ‘pops’ into my mind when I reminisce about this weekend were the abso-tutely-lutely decadent and delicious cake pops that we discovered in our welcome basket. Now let me just tell you, there’s dessert out there that’s good, but then there’s also stuff that’s cake-pop good.  After one bite, I became a self-declared cake pop addict.  The hardened outer shell of chocolate concealed the magical moist cake within the ball of goodness, creating an irresistible combination of double chocolate.

Chocolate on Vanilla. My personal favorite combination.

Like I said, it all went downhill after that first bite (from a healthy-living stand point).  Considering my taste buds had never been happier, I made it my personal mission to track down the recipe for these awesome treats, and it actually didn’t take me very long. Josh’s mother, Jane, was the wonderful woman with whom to credit my immediate obsession with cake pops, and she sent me this surprisingly easy recipe: (on a scale of 1 to 10 of how much I want YOU to try these with 10 being the most, this recipe is definitely an 11. Just sayin’)

The final product. Pretzels and chocolate going swimmingly together.

Cake Pops

 Source: Modified from Jane L.’s Recipe

Ingredients: 1 18.25 oz box of cake mix (and ingredients listed on back like eggs, vegetable oil, water), ¾ can of 16 oz can of icing, 1 ½ – 2 lbs candy coating chocolate, 1 bag small and skinny pretzel sticks

Directions:

1. Bake the cake following the instructions on an 18.25 oz box cake mix. Let cool completely.
2. Crumble the cake into a large mixing bowl.  It should be a fine texture with no large pieces.
3. Add ¾ can of frosting (16 oz).  Mix into crumbled cake until thoroughly combined.
4. Roll mixture into 1 ½” balls. Place on wax paper. Cover with plastic wrap, and chill for several hours in the fridge.
5. Melt candy coating chocolate (1 ½ – 2 lbs).  Microwave slowly or double boiler.
6. Take a few balls out at a time. Push a skinny pretzel stick into the center of a cake ball and then dip and coat in chocolate.  Place on wax paper to dry and harden.  Repeat.

So here’s to weddings going wondrously (without any Mamma Mia nor Taylor Swift drama), cake pops, and Jenny and Josh. Cheers!

"Please eat me so Sayre doesn't eat any more" -Healthy words of wisdom from the (inanimate) pops.